Tuesday, November 3, 2026Rehoboth Beach, DelawareEst. 2024 • Vol. III, No. 47
Boardwalk Barker

Boardwalk Barker

Sports

Scores, standings, and athletic achievements of questionable significance

SPORTS

Rehoboth Beach Volleyball League Suspends Player for 'Excessive Spiking Energy'

The league's disciplinary committee cited 'an unreasonable level of enthusiasm' and 'aggressive eye contact with the net' in its ruling.

By Sports Correspondent Hank Scoreboard·2 hours ago

SPORTS

Local Youth Soccer Coach Resigns, Cites 'Irreconcilable Differences With the Snack Schedule'

Coach Terry Blaine, who led the Rehoboth Rockets to a 3-7 season, said the final straw was a parent who brought raisins to a championship game.

By Sports Correspondent Hank Scoreboard·4 hours ago

SPORTS

Delaware Blue Hens Fan Base Cautiously Optimistic, As Always, For No Reason

Despite a 2-5 start to the season, Blue Hens supporters remain confident that 'this is the year,' a phrase that has been uttered annually since 1987.

By Sports Correspondent Hank Scoreboard·6 hours ago

SPORTS

Boardwalk 5K Finisher Insists He 'Wasn't Even Trying,' Finishes 847th Out of 850

Dave Plimpton, 41, crossed the finish line in 58 minutes while wearing flip flops, maintaining throughout that his real time would have been 'much faster' under different circumstances.

By Sports Correspondent Hank Scoreboard·Yesterday

SPORTS

Area Man's Fantasy Football Team Collapses, Blames Everyone Except Himself

After starting the season 0-6, Gerald Finch has attributed his team's struggles to bad luck, biased algorithms, and a 'fundamentally broken' scoring system.

By Sports Correspondent Hank Scoreboard·Yesterday

SPORTS

Miniature Golf Course on Boardwalk Reports Record Hole-in-One Claims, Zero Verified

The Pirate's Cove Mini Golf course logged 47 self-reported holes-in-one this summer, none of which occurred while a staff member was watching.

By Sports Correspondent Hank Scoreboard·2 days ago

Boardwalk Barker

All the News That's Fit to Fabricate

DISCLAIMER: Boardwalk Barker is a work of satire and parody. All stories, quotes, and events depicted herein are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to actual news is purely coincidental and frankly alarming. No seagulls were harmed in the production of this publication.

© 2026 Boardwalk Barker • Rehoboth Beach, Delaware • Serving the Delmarva Peninsula Since 2024