Tuesday, November 3, 2026Rehoboth Beach, DelawareEst. 2024 • Vol. III, No. 47
Boardwalk Barker

Boardwalk Barker

Obituaries

Remembering what we have lost, both real and metaphorical

OBITUARIES

In Memoriam: The Last Parking Spot on Rehoboth Ave, Gone But Never Forgotten

The spot, located at the corner of Rehoboth Avenue and First Street, was last seen on a Friday in July 2019. It is survived by a waiting list of 847 vehicles and a parking garage that 'should be fine, probably.'

By Obituaries Editor Mort Finley·Today

OBITUARIES

Beloved Local Institution 'The Good Weather' Passes After Brief Illness; Survived by Fog

The Good Weather, which had served the Rehoboth Beach community faithfully from Memorial Day through the third week of August, succumbed to a nor'easter on Tuesday. It was 87 days old.

By Obituaries Editor Mort Finley·Today

OBITUARIES

Area Man's Patience With the Self-Checkout Machine, 1997–2026

After 29 years of faithful service, the patience finally gave out at a Rehoboth Beach grocery store on a Sunday afternoon when the machine asked for the fourth time whether he had a loyalty card.

By Obituaries Editor Mort Finley·Today

OBITUARIES

Farewell to the Quiet Beach Morning, Claimed by a Family of Eight With a Bluetooth Speaker

The Quiet Beach Morning, which had arrived at 6:47 AM and showed great promise, was gone by 8:15. It is survived by the memory of what it could have been.

By Obituaries Editor Mort Finley·Yesterday

OBITUARIES

The Affordable Beach House Rental, 1985–2021: A Remembrance

The Affordable Beach House Rental, which once allowed middle-class families to spend a week at the shore without refinancing, passed quietly during the pandemic and has not been seen since.

By Obituaries Editor Mort Finley·Yesterday

OBITUARIES

Rehoboth's Last Pay Phone, Disconnected After 44 Years of Loyal Service

The phone, which had stood at the corner of Baltimore Avenue and Wilmington Avenue since 1982, made its final call on a Tuesday. The call was a wrong number.

By Obituaries Editor Mort Finley·2 days ago

Boardwalk Barker

All the News That's Fit to Fabricate

DISCLAIMER: Boardwalk Barker is a work of satire and parody. All stories, quotes, and events depicted herein are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to actual news is purely coincidental and frankly alarming. No seagulls were harmed in the production of this publication.

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