Tuesday, November 3, 2026Rehoboth Beach, DelawareEst. 2024 • Vol. III, No. 47
Boardwalk Barker

Boardwalk Barker

Politics

Covering the halls of power so you don't have to go near them

POLITICS

Congress Passes Resolution Declaring Funnel Cake an Official Food Group, Nutritionists Resign En Masse

The bipartisan measure passed 387-48, with the 48 dissenters later spotted eating funnel cake in the Capitol cafeteria.

By Washington Correspondent Bev Tidewater·2 hours ago

POLITICS

Senate Subcommittee Formed to Study Why Senate Subcommittees Take So Long

The new subcommittee, which has already scheduled its first recess, is expected to deliver preliminary findings sometime after the next election cycle.

By Washington Correspondent Bev Tidewater·4 hours ago

POLITICS

Nation's Economists Agree Economy 'Doing Something,' Refuse to Elaborate

In a rare show of unity, the nation's top economists issued a joint statement confirming that the economy is, in fact, occurring.

By Economics Desk Editor Buck Greenspan·5 hours ago

POLITICS

TSA Introduces Pre-Check Lane for People Who Have Their Shoes Off Before Being Asked

The new 'Proactive Compliance' lane will reward travelers who begin disrobing at the terminal entrance with expedited screening and a small certificate of appreciation.

By Washington Correspondent Bev Tidewater·6 hours ago

POLITICS

Delaware Governor Signs Bill Requiring All State Documents to Acknowledge Delaware Exists

The landmark legislation, passed unanimously, mandates that any federal form referencing the 50 states must include Delaware 'in a font no smaller than the others.'

By State House Reporter Donna Statehouse·Yesterday

POLITICS

Bipartisan Agreement Reached on Absolutely Nothing, Both Sides Declare Victory

After 14 hours of negotiations, lawmakers emerged from the Capitol to announce they had successfully agreed to continue disagreeing, calling it 'a historic moment for gridlock.'

By Washington Correspondent Bev Tidewater·Yesterday

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All the News That's Fit to Fabricate

DISCLAIMER: Boardwalk Barker is a work of satire and parody. All stories, quotes, and events depicted herein are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to actual news is purely coincidental and frankly alarming. No seagulls were harmed in the production of this publication.

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