Local Teen Activists Rally in Rehoboth

By Josh Glyphensburmontson  |  Youth Correspondent,  Guy with long name

REHOBOTH BEACH — A growing number of Sussex County students are speaking out about what they’re calling the “outrageously mid” quality of Skee-Ball prizes this season at both Funland and Zelky's.

The controversy began Monday afternoon when Cape Freshman Tyler B., clutching 412 tickets and a medium Mountain Dew, loudly informed his friends — and the entire arcade — that the prize wall was “absolute bullshit this year.”

“Bruh, last summer you could get a stuffed narwhal for 300 tickets,” Tyler explained, pointing at a wall featuring three rubber bracelets, a Chinese finger trap, and a plastic dinosaur with one eye. “Now it’s like… do I want a pencil sharpener or do I want a different pencil sharpener?

Funland management, when asked for comment, said only “We believe the prizes are fun and appropriate for all ages. Also, one of those pencil sharpeners glows in the dark."

But the students remain unmoved. Sussex Central tenth grader Kaylee J. argued that the ticket-to-reward ratio has collapsed entirely. “I scored 80,000 points,” she said (it was actually 280). “I should at least get a stuffed Spongebob. Or like, a mini lava lamp, or one of those AC/DC Mirrors. Something real.”

Some parents have privately backed the students, noting that they too have spent entire family beach days rolling wooden balls up a ramp only to return home with what one father described as “Forty-seven tickets and a slinky that lasted nine minutes.”

The student group plans to return next summer with a petition demanding better prizes — specifically “anything cool from TikTok,” plus an option to trade 1,000 tickets for a Louie's pizza.

Funland and Zelky's have not yet responded to the petition, though insiders report the prize wall may soon feature a bouncy ball shaped like a pineapple and some Squishmallows.