We're Hiring!

Location: Rehoboth Beach – Hybrid (mostly parked).

Status: Position remains open pending verification that it exists.

Department: Editorial Integrity & Other 

Theoretical Concepts

OVERVIEW

BoardWalk Barker seeks an experienced professional to establish and oversee the organization’s Fact-Checking Department — a cornerstone of our ongoing initiative to appear credible. The successful candidate will be tasked with implementing a comprehensive fact-verification system capable of operating in an environment almost entirely devoid of facts.

RESPONSIBLITIES

Develop and enforce procedures ensuring that at least one statement per article is technically accurate.

Maintain a searchable database of unverified rumors for future reference.

Coordinate with Legal to determine whether “allegedly” still covers us.

Publish quarterly reports confirming that our error rate remains within industry standards (±100%).

Conduct exit interviews with departing interns who claim to have seen the truth.

PREFERRED EXPERIENCE

Minimum 5 years’ experience distinguishing correlation from causation while under deadline pressure.

Demonstrated ability to use both Microsoft Excel and intuition to evaluate evidence.

Familiarity with Delaware gossip ecosystems strongly preferred.

Comfortable working without support, salary, or documentation.

COMPENSATION & BENEFITS

Title prestige disproportionate to resources provided.

Unlimited access to newsroom coffee (while supplies last).

Occasional public acknowledgment in our monthly “Corrections & Apologies” column.

Psychic satisfaction of knowing that, somewhere, a truth almost happened.

TO APPLY:

Submit a CV, three citations, and one conspiracy you’ve successfully debunked to hr@boardwalkbarker.com. Applicants will be reviewed in the order we remember they applied.

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BoardWalk Barker is a satirical publication. The stories and quotes herein are works of humor and parody.