REPORT: Americans Don't Boogey Like They Used To

By Octavia Byline  |  Entertainment News Reporter

WASHINGTON - In an alarming new report from the US Senate Cultural Heritage Committee concludes that boogeyman in America is at an all-time low.    

The surprising report is the result of a 6 year sociological study on the habits of Americans. The study conducted by the University of Maryland, determined that in addition to boogeying, there has been a steep decline in booty shaking and getting funky, while chilling and posting up have increased slightly in recent decades.  

Witnesses testified that boogeying has been in decline since the late seventies. "In the 1970s, everywhere you turned somebody was getting down, or at least grooving. The radio and the night clubs were alive with sounds to boogey too, and many entertainers of the day were quick to encourage the public to boogey, shake their booties, get down, dance, or at least do the hustle.  

"People were boogeying in their cars, at the supermarkets, the doctors office waiting room, even the elevators. There were constant reminders to get down and boogey," said Senator Hassan, ranking member of the committee.  

As more and more people prefer to post up in a spot and chill instead if getting funky on the dance floor, some experts believe boogeying will continue its descent into obscurity.  

Lawmakers are working on the problem and expect a bill to be in front of the full Senate by April which will try to revive boogeying again as a major activity among younger Americans by reintroducing disco music and lots of cocaine.